Once again Hollywood has provided us with another example of men behaving badly. This time it’s someone we all were stunned by, except of course by those in the know. Many things set this scandal apart from the others one of which is it involves one of America’s favorite dads, who not only on screen espoused morality and family life, but off screen as well.
This is an important fact because it is embedded in our collective memory buried deep in our psyche. Even back in the good ‘ol days when I grew up with rampant racism, everyone still loved Bill Cosby from the get go. I can’t remember anyone of any color who had a bad thing to say about him back in the ’70′s or ’80′s. We all laughed at his safe, funny jokes and retelling of hilarious family situations we could connect to in our own lives.
Then he placed himself on an even higher pedestal we put him on by taking to task the young rappers of the day, chastising their choice of words and subjects in their rhymes. Many rappers called him out of touch with reality of the young black male experience, He tried to show another way, that the immorality of the words and actions of these suddenly wealthy young hip hop artists were only going to lead to a destruction of black culture and ultimately themselves.
There was wisdom in his words. Like a father lecturing his children imparting knowledge in hopes of us learning a lesson without having to experience pain of our mistakes. TV interviews cemented his opinions and his war on what he saw was ignorance and set backs of youth. Many took the high ground with him and loved him even more for it.
When his only son was killed we grieved and cried with him and rightly so. Through the pain we admired him for his strength and courage and his unfailing commitment to his wife Camille and his family. It’s no wonder we loved him.
There are two sides to every coin and even more so with celebrities, who by necessity in order to sell themselves, have to have a very public persona of either their own or a publicists making. The outward image is just as important as the product of their art. It’s a delicate recipe that is destined to eventually fail if you are hiding something and Cosby was.
The allegations against him now are decades olds, or at least the ones we know about after these brave women finally had the courage to come forth. When I say finally, I hear a loud groan from the masses who believe that a woman after 50 yrs of living with this pain of rape from a very famous and powerful man, is only after money.
Let’s get real here. Decades have gone by and they have moved forward in their lives. If this were truly about money then the time would have been back then before the statutes of limitations ran out. If this were just hurt him then the time would have been back when the idea of a black man having sex with a white woman was very frowned upon, and racial hatred was even more a norm than it is today.
It’s about the truth. One thing that hasn’t changed in decades is still blaming the victim. It’s her fault she was raped. She must have wanted it. We forget that the birth of women’s equality was just beginning. Our mothers fighting valiantly to be taken seriously as one half of the human race that too had rights. To be more than a wife, mother and a whore in bed. Where women who did work outside the home were subjected to gropey bosses. Sexual harassment wasn’t even in our vernacular and women were supposed to just put up with it and be flattered even if it made you feel uncomfortable and unsafe. He could make or break your career and because he was so powerful who would believe you anyway? So you kept silent.
The women who are coming forward against Cosby now do so at personal risk of ridicule and threats to expose the man for what he is, a hypocrite and a rapist with the hidden morals of a pervert.
Why should any women who has been abused or raped come forward and endure the long ago memory and pain talk now? Why not just leave it in the past? The simple answer is for a catharsis in their own lives. To be finally free of something that tormented them all these years while they watched their attacker continue to reap the rewards of celebrity and adoration knowing there is a monster underneath the façade. To claim their life back from someone who’s one immoral action took it away.
The pedestal is high. The fall is hard, not just for him, but for all of us who believed in him.
Originally posted on 101 Books:
Is it okay to dog ear your pages?
My answer: Absolutely!
Write all up in there, too. Write in the margins, underline words and passages, circle phrases you like. And dog ear to your heart’s content.
That’s just my opinion. Dog-earing pages and writing inside of books shows effort. It shows you’ve spent time there and appreciated the content of those pages—as opposed to opening a book and being unable to tell whether it’s ever been read.
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Originally posted on Crazy Cat Lady Rantings:
This is Rolf. Rolf is a 50 something gay man who is proud to be himself. Rolf is not worried about what you think of him
and that’s a good thing. He told me he chooses to wear the outfit you see here along with what you don’t see, black leather
short shorts and combat boots, because that’s what makes him feel comfortable and unique. It’s a style he’s loved since the 70′s and 80′s.
Now there is more to Rolf than just his manner of dress. He’s outgoing,very friendly and very sociable. Something I imagine most
people wouldn’t get to know if they avoided him by the way he looks, which brings to my mind many other people I’ve known in
the past who have been judged on appearances alone. People who’s handicap, skin color, body size, manner of dress or looks
preceded any notion of who they really are. We are all guilty of it, we’ve all made snap judgments about someone meet for the
first time whether for good or bad. This is instinctual, buried somewhere in our long forgotten ancestral past. Humans have a pack
mentality, we are after all animals. Birds of a feather flock together stuff. Whole societies have and still do hold to that mentality,
some with hatred and murderous outcomes. My way or the highway by force is necessary.
Most of us spend our lives trying to live up to the standards our parents and cultural expectations put up before us, whether
It’s religious beliefs, manner of dress or social attitudes. For someone born with a creative and unique mind, who like to step
outside of the box society expect us to live in, this is stifling. We have all heard the stories or even known someone who became
what their parents expected instead of what they really wanted to be for fear of rejection, disapproval and disappointing others.
When we limit someone to our standards we not only do them a disservice we do ourselves the same. The next Picasso could be
perishing behind a desk pushing buttons on a computer instead of creating a beautiful masterpiece. The next great inventor is not
taken seriously because of a society that in it’s collectiveness, is not ready to accept someone’s ability because of their handicap.
Yes it’s true sometimes we hold up a person to praise and awe because despite their disability, they accomplished something fantastic.
That in itself is a shame. How hard did that person have to fight to be accepted and how many more did we turn our backs on not even
wanting to give them a chance.
Acceptance of others is not easy, acceptance of ourselves is even harder. When I look in the mirror I sometimes play the what if game?
What if I had less wrinkles, what if I had a more acceptable body type, what if I had pushed myself to become more successful in society’s
view, would I be as happy ?or would I feel all the life slowly being sucked out of my soul trying to conform to someone’s expectation of me.
How do I and can I win the inward struggle to accept myself warts, wrinkles, fat and all.
Now I’m not saying to do this we all need to wear leather short shorts and combat boots, unless of course that’s what you like. I’m not saying
ditch all of the conformist attitudes of society, they are there after all for our own well being. Rules bring order to chaos and laws make sure we
don’t get to out of hand. I for one don’t want to go to work in an anything goes environment, nothing would get accomplished, but I also don’t
want to be defined by others by my outward appearance, handicap or the job I do. What I am hoping for is not only to have the freedom to be
me but the acceptance to be me by others even if they don’t like me or what I do or stand for.
To have this I have to first accept the Rolf’s of the world and celebrate the art of being.
Here’s hoping all of you can do the same.
Originally posted on PopWatch:
[ew_image url="http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/i/2014/10/13/Baby-Dancing-Groot.jpg" credit="" align="left"]
After Guardians of the Galaxy all but won the summer—and Dancing Baby Groot won Guardians of the Galaxy—it was only a matter of time before someone created a Dancing Baby Groot toy. After all, there’s a high probability that the demand for a Dancing Baby Groot will be to holiday season 2014 what the demand for a Furby was to holiday season 1998.
It’s not terribly far-fetched, actually, to imagine that the adults who got a Furby in 1998 are probably the same people now getting Dancing Baby Groots. That is, until they see the lackluster toy.
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